Fight or Flight

America’s Next Top Model

Cycle: 12

Episode: 9

Yay! Brazil this week!

Teyona thinks she’s the SHIZZZZ now.  Fo is jealous that Teyona picked Celia over her.  Fo realize that there are no friends in the house.  Natalie is happy for Brazil because it’s warm there and NYC is too cold for her liking.  Oh pooh pooh for you! Aminat says being in Brazil is mind-blowing.  Well, let’s not go that far.

The girls arrive and meet with with a model named Fernanda, she is the host of Brazil’s next top model.  They’re in Sao Paolo.  Fernanda tells them about the “Girl From Ipanema“, for those of you who don’t know why she’s famous, click this link. They have to go to her favourite places.  The girls pair up.  Teyona and Aminat, Natalie and Fo, and then the blondes.  What’s with the race-pairings? Fo wants to knock Teyana down.  Good luck!  Natalie needs a more supportive bra for running in.  Allison thinks it’s neat to meet the girl from Impanema, it’s cool to meet someone who has a song named after them.  Yaaaawn, Allison bores me.  Fo and Natalie are in the lead.  Fo and Natalie get there first.  Yay team Brunette!  There’s an old guy singing the song, then the woman shows up in the background.  She looks really good still!  Wow, what is in the water there?  She’s gotta be in her late 50’s or so.  TGFI is showing them how to move, she also gives them the keys to their new home.

Their new place is awesome!  Well, it’s a little tacky, but it’s awsome!  Fo can’t pronounce Swarovski.  Pfft.  The place is littered in narcissistic photos of Tyra Banks, as per usual.  There’s only 3 beds, so they have to share.  All the gals are ganing up on Natalie.  Natalie says “the only goal here was to get a tan.”  LOL.  Um, the ONLY goal?  Well, as long as we know where you stand.

Natalie asks where the ocean.  Um….it’s Sao Paulo!  Isn’t that a fairly land-locked city?!  LOL.  Aminat feels like she needs to up her game.  They arrive to people doing Capoeira.  Aminat says that it reminded her of breakdancing but with more of a martial arts feel.  The Capoeira instructor’s name is Eddy Murphy!?  What?  LOL.  The girls test it out.  OMG, they’re so inflexible and uncoordinated!  Celia gets too deep on this again.  Aminat is like “Natalie sucks.”  Teyana did the lamest cartwheel i’ve EVER seen!  OMG, Celia Chuck-Norris-Roundhouse-Kicks Aminat in the face! Aminat said if she does it the second time, she gets her legs broken.  Whatevs!  Celia and Aminat go against each other.  The Jays are there.  I never think about Mr. Jay being tall, but he is tall. (I looked it up, he’s 6′ tall) He always looks like such a cute little munchkin!  So, their contest, is whoever wins, gets to take frames away from a girl of their choice.  OH!  That’s stiring some chili in the pot! Teyana fears being targeting.  The girls do their Capoeira-posing.  Natalie is very embarassed to look as stupid as she does.  Celia points out that Natalie has to feel “hot” doing everything she does, therefore looking silly.  Agreed. The Verdict:  They hated Teyana’s lack of posing, They liked Allison’s poses, Celia hid her face, Fo did a good job but had a crunchy face, Natalie was like a can-can dancer, Aminat was the strongest they’ve seen but they hated her ghetto face.  That made me laugh.

Challenge Winner: Fo! She gets 50% more frames on her next shoot, and she’s going to cut Teyana’s frames.  One, because she’s a good competitor, and for payback for being a bitch.  Teyana says she’s going to bring it.  Bring it on!

Tyra Mail: Tomorrow they will enjoy the fruits of their labour.  Teyana confronts Fo about picking her since she’s good competition.  Fo is like “taste of your own medicine, bitch.” They go at it for the thing that happened this week, and last week.  Whatever, hurt feelings.  Who cares.  I never really saw the two of them as friends before, so it’s hard to now…and to care about it.

The girls arrive to meet Mr. Jay in one of the shanty towns, or “favelas.“  They will be styled as Carmen Miranda a la Chiquita Banana. They need lots of sex appeal.  So natalie thinks this one’s in the bag for her.  They will be photographed by a Vogue fashion photographer.  The girls ask the makeup squad about Carmen Miranda.  They of course know all about her.  They ask if shse died a “normal death.”  What???  He’s like *sarcastically* “no, she died a HORRRRIBLE death.”  LOL.  That makeup guy is HILARIOUS.  Celia is touched at how the poor people live.

Jay tells Celia she needs to be more provacative in this shoot.  He wouldn’t call it incredible.  Aminat and Teyana are going on about Teyana’s spat with Fo.  Fo hears them talk smack about them.  Dramz!!! Allison is shooting now, she looks really cool.  Jay likes where she’s going.  He says today her face came alive and she was kinda sexy.  Emphasis on sexy.  Natalie almost wipes out in the heels!  Natalie tries her sluttiest to do a good shot.  Natalie doesn’t like how they’re in a poor area.  She feels she’s done great, Jay says she has.  Aminat is next.  Jay suggests Aminat uses more movement with her body.  He says she gets on set and shuts herself off.  Teyana is going to have to BRING IT now.  Teyana made her smile model-y and she only had 25 frames.  Fo is next, and she had the most frames.  Jay says he’s feeling too literal Carmen Miranda, like a drag queen.  Jay tells her to break it down.  He doesn’t want her to pose.  Jay says it wasn’t the most genius, and she needed the extra frames.

Tyra Mail: Tomorrow you will meet with the judges, only 5 will continue on.  Natalie says she’s not nervous, it’ll be hard for them to find a bad picture.  Aminat is worried about panel.  Fo is hoping she’ll get a good photo.

JUDGING!!!

The girls show up all colourful.  Apparently Sao Paolo is the fashion-capital of Brazil.  It’s also the capital-capital.  She introduces the regulars.  Fernanda Motta is the guest judge. Tyra does a little dance.  Ghey… Tyra describes what a favela is “the hood, kinda, over here.”  Aminat comes in, and looks good.  Her shot is okay, not sure about the body, she needs to experiment more with her poses.  They say she is beautiful, but she’s boring as a model.  Natalie is next.  Nigel doens’t think it’s particularly extraordinary.  She’s just serious looking.  The sparkle is missing.  Natalie says that Jay told her what she was doing was well.  Natalie is trying to blame Jay!  Tyra reprimands her. Celia is up next.  Nigel loves of Celia offers the judges an adjective.  There is no sparkle.  It’s pose-y.  Tyra says this was her weakest shoot.  Allison is next.  Nigel likes it, it has essence of Carmen Miranda.  They look at her face first.  Paulina loves her adorable face.  Tyra says she looks active and alive, and sexy!  Fo is up next.  Ms.  Jay says she looks casual.  Nigel says she looks the best he’s ever seen her, since she came in smiling.  Her photo is TOO similar to who Carmen Miranda is but the fashion is missing.  Teyona is last.  Teyona is wearing some pyjama looking dress.  They like her photo and it’s great, but they don’t see Carmen Miranda.  They feel she feels at home in the environment.  She’s like Carmen Miranda but with the attitude.  Guess Teyona BROUGHT IT!  Lol.  Boo-ya Fo!

DE-LIB-ER-ATE…

They find Natalie very, very boring.  They think that Allison has turned things up a notch.  They feel that Allison went through so many incarnations.  They feel Fo’s pic was a Fo-paux!  lol. They have no idea what is up with Aminat.  They hate their pictures.  Tyra says she is a noun, not a verb.  They say that Celia is not terribly photogenic.  They finally say she photographs too old!!!  Tyra says that when she looks upclose at Celia’s photos, she looks as old as Tyra is.  It’s TRUE!  They love Teyana’s picture, and feels that it’s cutting edge.

CALL OUT

1) Allison

2) Teyana

3) Fo

4) Celia

It’s down to Aminat and Natalie.  This is a tough one, they both suck for the same reasons for me.  Tyra says that Natalie is one of the prettiest girls in the bunch, but her posing is obvious, she’s uninspring.  Aminat has the best body in the bunch, and she thinks she is doing more than she portrays.  She think she has vitality and fieceness, but it’s stuck in her head.  Aminat stays!

5) Aminat

Buh bye Natalie!  Tyra tells her she has to push, it’s not just about being pretty or taking pretty pictures, because if that was the case, she’s be a supermodel.  Well, so much for getting that tan Natalie!

I think it’s going to be between Teyana and Allison in the end!!! If you ask me!  Or at least it SHOULD be.  Simply put, they both jsut have the right “look” for right now.  The unique beauty.  Aminat, Fo and Celia (especially) are everyday people.

Blah, Blah, You’re Fat…

America’s Next Top Model

Cycle: 12

Episode: 8

Episode Title: Rewind

So i’ve been on a hiatus! but i HAVE been keeping up!  I just haven’t had the opportunity to blog for the last few Wednesdays.

I’m back though!

So I’m also SUPER GLAD that stoopid Tahlia Brookins is gone!  Now the real competition can begin! I will REALLY have to revise my list predictions….eek.  So Allison and Celia are like bezzie mates now.  Celia says she has to think of sex to get a good look on her face.  LOL.  Aminat talks about how she can’t talk good. LOL.  Tyra Mail: “A top model knows how to be direct.” They think they’re going abroad.  London tells Celia about how she street-preaches.  I feel they’re focusing on London from the start…and that means that she’ll go this episode.  After watching 12 cycles of this religiously, you start to feel hints.  Maybe i’m wrong!

The girls meet with Mr. Jay.  Celia’s face gets older every day.  Did she just turn 42? Jay tells the models they need to know what a creative director does, so they can be better models.  Their challenge is to be a creative director. Editor-in-chief of 17 Mag, Anne Choket (sp?) tells them they’ll be modelling South Pole Jr.  The client wants the feel to be “street style, with attitude.”  Well, Aminat should get this in the bag!  They will creative direct each other on a photoshoot.  The glam squad will also take their direction.  This is kind of a fun challenge!  They will also edit their film and choose final shots.  Natalie is directing Teyana.  The photo is awkward instead of stylish.  Allison is directing Aminat.  Jay says he’s never heard her talk so much. She says this is what she’s all about.  Jay likes the way Aminat looks, the way that Allison has styled her.  That’s interesting…  The final photo was OK.  Fo is directing London.  She was worried about what London would wear, since her body isn’t skinny enough.  London says she feels fat as a freak.  She feels she’s gained about 10-15 lbs.  How is that POSSIBLE?  She really does look dumpy…how long ago was casting? Aminat is trying to direct Natalie now, but she does not like her.  Aminat’s personal feelings toward Natalie is “I don’t like you.” Jay says Aminat is not using her time well.  Aminat is sucking mad.  Aminat is making crazy excuses.  Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.  Her final photo was boring.  Teyana is directing Celia.  Teyana wants her to act like she’s “coming out of her project house on a sunny morning.”  Something tells me that Celia does not know where to pull from that allusion.  Good shot though!    London is directing Allison, and London feels challenged.  She tries to give Allison rocker chic.  Jay says that London has styled Allison exactly the way she looked before they cut London’s hair! LOL.  It’s the exact outfit!  LOL. Celia is directing Fo.  Fo looks good.  Shot is okay.

Winner of the challenge: Teyana! She will not be in 17 magazine’s June issue.  Teyana picks Celia and Aminat.  Celia was her model, so she chose her.  Fo is jealous, she thought that she was Teyana’s homey in the house.  So Celia, Aminat and Teyana are all shot for 17 magazine.  Too bad Celia looks like a 17 year old’s soccer mom.

Tyra mail:  You haven’t had too much R&R, maybe it’s time for some R&B.  They think it’s an R&B music video.  Oh no…Tyra’s not going to do that AGAIN is she?

Jay wakes the ladies up.  Allison says she looked like a woodland creature when she woke up.  Jay tells them that hair and makeup came to their house, it’s the high-life.  Fo says it was a luxury to have them there in their living room, waiting on them.  The doorbell rings.  It’s Ciara!  Aminat ran and hugged her like they were long lost sisters.  That’s awkward.  She’s an R&B singer, for those who don’t know.  She’s going to be in a photoshoot with the girls today.  They get in that ugly limo to the photoshoot location.

They will all be with Ciara on-stage.  Ciara is going to be on-stage and they will be her obsessed fan, twined up in her microphone cord. The girls are all excited.  The photographer is Mike Ruiz.  He looks like Sal Romano from Mad Men. So today’s shoot they’ll be in bathing suits, and London has gained all this weight.  She’s unhappy.  Well, maybe she should have watched her weight!

Celia is up, she does well and looks really good actually.  She needs lots of makeup, and she got it.  A little porn-star looking though. Ech.  London is next, she feels very uncomfortable.  London is SO self-concious.  Jay wonders if she’s gained a LOT of weight.  He thinks it’s unprofessional.  Jay says she needs to treat her body as a temple.  Jay sits her down and talks to her about her size physically.  He says that he worries about her in the modelling world.  London says she feels like a fat cow essentially.  I’m surprised she didn’t start crying.  I would have! Teyana looks really good.  I’ve always liked her look though.  Jay says she’s doing well.  OMG, Natalie’s hair is awesome!  Jay tells her to go out of her comfort zone.  Jay tells Natalie to snarl more, it’s good for her.  LOL.  Fo looks good, she always does.  Allison comes up, she always looks so awkward.  She looks really good in that getup though.  Jay tries to get her out of her signature “look.”  She’s trying really hard, and she works a bit.  Jay says he had to lose his fuse to get it though.  Aminat is next, she looks aweful.  Jay is frustrated with her.  OH man! It’s so hard to watch her, she’s so awkward!  Wrap!

Tyra mail: Tomorrow you will meet with the judges, only 6 will continue on. Oh, I fear for London.  Aminat should know she’s in the gutter too though at this point.  London told the girls that Jay called her back to tell her “blah, blah, you’re fat.”

Judging!

Tyra announces the prizes, again.  Guest judge today is Mike Ruiz, the photographer.  A male model in a speedo comes and brings Tyra something, he’s speaking in Brazil!  They’re going to Brazil!!!  This is SUPER cheesy!  That’s the hottest Brazillian they could find? I didn’t realize they’d annouce the location yet.  6 of them are going to Brazil.

Natalie – She looks good, and she does stand out more than Ciara.  Her face is rough, but I like it actually.  Tyra agrees with me!  It’s fierce!  Lol.

Aminat – Tyra says Aminat looks cute today.  Meh.  Aminat looks bewildered.  The makeup is VERY tranny too.  They don’t like it.  Neither do I.  Tyra says she looks lost, and can’t understand how her body relates to her camera.

Celia – Paulina remarks how she brings it every week.  She’s getting a job out of this somehow!  Celia says she likes her photo.  It’s very fierce too.  She looks like a fan that wants fame.  Lol.

Teyana – Challenge winner, congrats.  Ooh, she looks really good.  They call her fierce!  The photographer said she worked it out the best.

London – London looks very awkward.  Too much nostril.  They say she looks cartoonish.  Ms. Jay asks her what she’s eating, and that she needs to maintain her size.

Fo – Ms. Jay thinks she looks great.  She does.  She’s trying now.  Her photo looks really good, that lippy looks good on her.

Allison – Woo, a different face.  She looks really good, she shows up Ciara.  Ms. Jay says her body could have expressed more.  The photographer said she had to be provoked.  Allison sucks up to the photographer saying he was her favorite photographer.  Nigel’s like “uh…me?”  D’oh! *smacks forehead*

They didn’t like how Natalie was dressed at panel.  They are disappointed by Aminat, they say she’d be good for runway, but not for print.  They say she does have potential, but it does not translate.  The photographer felt June Cleaver.  They feel that she looks like a stylist.  Tyra says they might want to keep her to see what she’ll wear next week.  LOL.  They say Teyana is consistent.  They say that they can’t see London doing runway or commercial.  They comment on her weight.  They love Fo’s face.  The photographer loves her.  Allison gives them the same thing over and over again, there’s no remaking her.

The Order:

1) Teyana

2) Fo

3) Natalie

4) Celia, guess they do want to see more looks

5) Allison

Aminat & London

They say Aminat might only be able to do Runway modelling.  The judges think that London has the best bone structure, and a good smile-with-her-eyes.

6) Aminat

London’s out!  Wow, that sucks. She REALLY should have watched her weight.  Plus, putting on 10-15 lbs in that time span is UNHEALTHY! She must have been anorexic before, to just have piled that weight on.

Exit Interview: London thought she’d be upset with god for being eliminated, but she’s not at all, surprisingly enough.  She feels she can lose her weight, and she’ll still be modelling.

Sunny the Great

::: Day before Runway Show

from last episode…. The “ish” with Brandon and Jason and the dress… Jason tries to say he’s using Brandon properly and diligently.  Brandon says it does not look like his dress.  Jason looks PISSED.  Don’t think I’ve ever seen him pissed.  They go for a smoke.  Jason says he has no time for drama, it’s his focus to get the dress done.  He puffs his lungs out.

Jessica tries to do a dress to match her collection for Cheryl.  Brian is concerned that Sunny’s dress looks like bridal.  Sunny says if he doesn’t win, he’s calling it quits with fashion.  That’s a terrible attitude.  I’m disappointed in his attitude. Brian gives them more things that they need to do, a presentation on their price points etc.  Now they have a presentation to do too.  Jessica isn’t happy!  Jessica is now sad that Kim is leaving, only now that she’s been happy she’s there!  Jeff points out “that’s a full-circle moment.”  lol. Did Jessica get more piercings?  I don’t remember that labret ring before…

They are giving the presentations right now.  They smash down Jessica’s ideal market – women 25-35, high-end.  She likes the feedback though.  Jason says his market is 20 to 60.  Um…they don’t agree with that.  They think his like is 30plus.  Sunny’s stuff is really pricey.  This could be why his old label didn’t succeed.  They tell him that it’s challenging to get into that market.  Sunny says he doesn’t want to be lost in basics.  Well…it’s called diversifying.  Make some stuff affordable, then make a few expensive focal pieces.

Cheryl Hickey time!  Cheryl likes Sunny’s outfit.  She says it’s gorgeous. It IS a little bridal, but nice.  Cheryl likes Jason’s dress.  She thinks it’s really fun. It doesn’t look bad on her actually.  She tries on Jessica’s dress, it doesn’t seem that she really likes it.  Cheryl feels “one of the girls” is going to come out.  She’s concerned with that. It’s obvious she doesn’t like it.  She’s having a confidence issue now again with this dress.  She’s stressing me out!  She makes me want a drink!  Jessica says she’s embarrassed.  Kim tries to build up her confidence.  The Jessica slogan is “Screw it up, Fix it, and Win.” Kim and Jessica are like THIS *crossed fingers together* now.  Brian tells them they have until midnight.  Then they turn into pumpkins.  Brian thanks them for letting him be part of the journey and hugs them.  He’s such a sweet man!

Sunny says he wants his comeback, and if Britney can do it, so can he.  LOL.

::: Day of Runway Show

Sunny says it’s a good experience, and he feels he should never question his instincts. They head over to fashion week tents.  Jessica is well dressed today.  They saw “Bidell” under the tend today.  It’s Ivan Bidell, the winner from last year.  Jessica says she was a huge fan of him last season.  I didn’t recognize him!  I liked him last year though!  He says he’s done really well in fashion.  Really?  I’m always so shocked when I hear about anything or anyone in the arts in Canada being successful.  It just feels like this isn’t the place (country) for arts to prosper.  I always feel if I wanted to do something artsy or creative I’d have to move to Europe or the U.S.  Moving on!  Just a mention, I like that hair on Jessica, I think it’s her “thing.” She needs a “thing.”  She shouldn’t change it back to brown, she’d blend in too much.

Jessica says it’s crazy backstage.  There’s so many people etc.  Sunny has some REALLY creepy looking hat!  It’s like a hat/mask.  Weird. More L’Oreal plugs!  Jason’s models all have really cool french braids.  Makes me want my hair long to braid it again!  That’s kind of a classy look I wasn’t expecting from Jason.  Jessica looks petrified.  Someone get this girl a paper bag!  Jason is very “in the groove.”  Sunny seems quite at home.  But he’s freaking out cause his girls aren’t even done.  Wrap it up!

Ooohh, the show!!!!  Iman looks awesome!  Jewel tones are good on her.

Sunny’s Collection

Sunny tells how he chose “battle” and “Alexander Great” as inspiration.  The “jacket” comes down, looks good.  Nothing unique.  Another outfit comes down, wierd earmuffs, ok.  A short dress with puffsleeves comes down, i like it.  Another fur piece, it’s ugly.  The wierd mask comes down, it’s wierd.  A nice jacket comes down, best pieces.  Another peices with feathers comes down.  If it didn’t have the feathers, it’d be nice.  A strange gold dress comes down.  It’s cool.  A python dress, okay.  The music is pretty hawt though!  Cheryl Hickey comes down.  The dress is nice, but it does NOT go with the rest of the collection.  The collection is hard, and Cheryl’s dress is soft.  His last dress is nice with the heading.  Nothing crazy hot though.  It’s all very “now” however.  It should get good reviews.  I like it all except for gorilla arms outfit!

Jason’s Collection

He says his inspiration is his family, tells his mom he loves her.  He calls his stuff “global glamour.”  These big puff sleeves comes down.  I don’t like it.  The second outfit, much better, nice jacket/scarf.  The third, I hate it, it looks very “Sirens” from the mall. The next, a ruffle dress, it’s boring, seen it, it’s very 80’s. Next dress, it’s a slip, it’s boring too, it’s Calvin Klein a few years ago. Another gold collared dress comes down, I’ve seen it before.  Another gold dress with ruffles.  Eh.  One dress the girl has SUCH a hard time walking in!  It looks REALLY stoopid too.  ANOTHER model, having a hard time walking. There’s sequin pants, which i’ve seen in 2007 on Posh Spice from another designer done better. Last dress, simply black dress with a big fan and ruffile in the back.  Cheryl comes out, that dress looks like a potato sack on her!  I liked it before, but not now!  Another dress all gold sequins.  Eh, very show-girl.  It actually looks like my prom dress from 2000.  Music was alright!

Jessica’s Collection

Inspiration is Greta Garbo/hip hop swagger.  Her first outfit, girl has hard time walking, but looks hawt!  The next, looks really good too.  Her stuff is very wearable.  I like the swagger on the bum.  the next, i love that jacket, I like the gold vesty thing.  The pink dress is nice, nothing crazy special.  A gold jumper is hawt, very in right now.  She has a patterned dress that’s REALLY hip hop, I can see Kimora Lee Simmons wearing it. A gold dress comes down that’s really nice too, not very wearable though.  Another fur collared peices comes down, nice.  She does fur better than Sunny.  A gold dress, ok.  A jumper with a black caplet comes down, not bad.  Cheryl comes down, wow, this dress looks AWESOME on her.  It’s the BEST i’ve seen Cheryl look actually. Next, a hot pink number I LOVE.  A gold chain dress comes down, its AWESOME.  How many times have I said AWESOME now?  Her collection was the best IMHO.  Plus, the music was HAWT!

Well, this was really good overall, but I liked Jessica’s the best, Jason’s the worst.

There are many mixed reviews from people.  Iman says they looked better than last year’s.  I’d say!  They were all very professional collections!  My one big caveat was how Jason kept using those black lace leggings on basically ALL his models!!!  It was overkill and I feel took away from some of his outfits.  Over-accessorizing.

::: JUDGING!!!

Iman introduced the judges.  Guest judge is Ivan Biddell, winner from last season.  He made the dress on Iman that night.  Nice.

They start with Jason.  He says his inspiration was LA Cocktail party.  He wanted nice dresses for nightlife.  Shawn asks what was the biggest risk he took.  Jason says the sequins, because the fabric was hard.  Rita says she liked the pieces were there was just a “touch” of sequins, and his collection wasn’t very sophisticated.  Ivan said he loved the gold pants.  Yeah, well, they were done before. Iman said that she took it personally when a model couldn’t walk.  Ivan said some of his stuff was very Playboy Mansion.  OH! Snap! Iman asks him what kind of a designer does he want to be? He says he has to figure that out.  Uh…shoulda already figured that out by now!

Sunny says this collection is what he’s all about.  He wants people to want his stuff.  Rita calls him a superstar. He has amazing talent, taste.  Ivan says that his collection was great, and glad he wasn’t in his season!  He marks how hot the looks are he has right now.  Iman says that his inspiration was clear, it was Alexander the Great.  Iman says there a couple of pieces she wants.

Jessica says she wants hollywood glamour and hip hops.  She wanted to use fabrics in the 30’s.  Ivan says he loves her clothes, and knows girls who would, and they need to hang out. Shawn says that the clothers were J-Lo.  He wasn’t sure that they were fitting together, he felt he was looking at two collections.  They loved the cowel bumb.  Rita says it was her best work so far, that the opening number was fantastic.  She would have loved to have seen more boho dresses.  I really loved that middle dress too!  Iman said everyone thougth her show was “a show.”

They wait in the back.  Jessica and Jason say that they wish Sunny wasn’t in their season either!  Lol.

The judges say that Jason’s show was a little disappointing, it was a regurgitation.  They said there was not one design to see what he was about.  Iman says he does not take critique well.  They feel that he knew his stuff wasn’t that good.  They feel he needs focus.  They say that Jessica’s pieces were realy strong and full of promise.  Ivan said it’s very hip, and he knows girls that would die to have that.  They say that Jessica is moving in the right direction, that this is her first collection, and it’s very impressive.  Rita said it was fantastic to see.  About Sunny, he showed incredible versatility, and he can deliver it in a unique way.  They loved the tailoring, the movement, everything was perfect.  They talked about the mask, the fact that he made it!  He’s unbelievable.

Iman says they all created truly amazing collections, but there must be one winner.  She says Jason has defined the borders of where he is as a designer, but fashion has no limits and he needs to push beyond his borders.  Iman says Jessica has come a long way baby, best work yet.  She tells Sunny that he is Sunny the great.  Their decision was unanimous…

And the Winner is….Sunny Fong!!!

I KNEW he’d win!  I really feel like that’s deserved, at the same time I feel like Jessica deserved it, but she has time yet to become good.

Jessica’s like “goddam Sunny.”  Sunny’s mom looks really happy!  Jason says he’s not disappointed, his eyes are really opened.  Jessica says she’s proud of what she showed, and that she feels like the underdog, and has learned a lot, she feels there is a bigger picture.

Iman congratulates Sunny, and asks when he’ll design for her.  His model Tori has one as well!  I bet she’s happy she latched onto him.  Tori is really proud of him.  Sunny’s mom and hubby comes out.  Sunny says this has brought him and his mother closer together.  Brian comes out and congratulates Sunny.  The rest of the season contestants come out and congratulate him.  Sunny says now it’s a different story, he’d never quit fashion now.  He’s excited for the future.

Congratulations Sunny!

That’s My Dress!

Project Runway Canada

Season: 2

Episode: 11

Brian checks out Jason’s progress on his collection.  He’s got some real “jazzy” items. He’s doing strappy things.  Why is he doing that?  He says he wants a cocktail dress LA feel.  Brian says he wants new things and more from Jason.  Brian says he thinks that Jason thinks he picks on him, and it’s cause he wants to push him.  Jason says tough-love sucks.  Jason says it’s a show-stopping collection, and he has so much confidence in himself.  Brian is invited to Jason’s family get-together.  Jason says his confidence comes from the people around him.  OMG, all his relatives look exactly like him.  Duh, I know.  No, I mean EXACTLY like him.  It kinda reminds me of this one Simpsons episode where Homer gathers all his relatives on his front lawn to show Lisa that not all Simpsons suffer the “idiot gene.”  Only, they’re all stupid except for the women.  Anyway, I digress…. Jason has a girlfriend apparently!  OMG.  Is he just making himself LOOK gay to look the part of a fashion designer guy?  It’s like he had a checklist.  Jason’s Guide of How To Look Gay: 1) Earring, check. 2) Tanktop, check. 3) Lisp, check. 4) Highlights, check. 5) Big sunglasses, check. His grandmother wears head-to-toe Jason Meyers.  Oh, it’s Jason’s mom, she looks just like I pictured her too actually.  He says again how he owes everything to his mother and how she’s his number one.  Brian enjoyed himself.

Jessica is next!  She’s in Fergus, ON.  I’m surprised, I thought she’d live downtown.  She takes after mother. Jessica says her parents are immigrants, and her mother is Acorean, and her father is Italian.  Jessica says in highschool she took a fashion class and she’s wanted to design ever since.  Her parents are very supportive.  They toast to Jessica.  Jessica takes him to some creepy beaver-panelled room to murder him and shows him her collection.  Her collection is all about glamour meets hip-hop, meets classic 1930’s.  Huh? Brian isn’t sure about some of her more casual items.  He also criticizes her construction.  Brian is concerned how her ideas are going to come together.  He says that her ideas are weak, only her jacket is good.  Jessica looks stunned, and Brian looks hot and sweaty.  Haha.  Jessica says she’s overwhelmed right now, she just needs to cry it out, then man up and bring it to the table.

Yay, Sunny’s next!  He’s in Toronto.  Duh. He’s got a condo/apartment.  Sunny only has a few items.  He uses fur, that’s really gross.  I’m not that big a fan now.  He used Alexander the Great as inspiration.  Really?  Oh, he says it’s Peta friendly, that means it must be fake fur. Well, that’s good.  So apparently Sunny’s mom is doing Sunny’s bead-work for him.  He wants to hear his mom say she’s proud of him.  He needs so much approval.  Sunny is freaking out since he has nothing but his little sketches.  Brian is going to meet Sunny’s friends.  Sunny’s friends loks awesome.  Brian meets Kenny, Sunny’s husband, who has been with him for four years.  Sunny said he launched his like VAWK, and showed at Toronto fashion week and sold some items, then he was $40,000 in debt, so Project Runway Canada is his last hurrah. Well, he’s working like it is!

Jessica said she fell out of love with her collection, but now she’s really happy with it.  Jessica says her career has started now no matter what happens.  That’s true, she’s such a positive person. Jessica was glad to see Jason, they both missed Sunny too.  Sunny shows up with a wierd hair cut.  Oh, it’s just a shorter mohawk.  Jason tells them that they’re all winners.  Is that a Winners plug?

Oohoh, they have a new workroom.  Get those collections out!  Jessica said that she thought when Jason got kicked out originally, that was “all she wrote” for Jason.  Guess not! Sunny looked at Jessica’s collection, and was a little afraid.  Jason says that Jessica’s collection looks really solid.  Jessica says Sunny better take his stuff out of the bags, cause she’s dying.  Jessica says Sunny has really amazing stuff.  Jason’s like “oh, you got some animals in there eh?”  Haha.  Sunny did use a lot of faux-fur.

Brian tells them there will be over 1,000 people at this show.  He wants to see their collections.

Jessica tells Brian that she worked it out.  She must work under pressure.  Brian likes her stuff.  The other two look intimidated.  Brian says there’s nothing he can really criticize.  She says it’s nice to have that critique.

Sunny shows Brian his items.  Brian says his collection is good, but he’s got stiff competition.  Sunny says that kept him in check.

Jason says comfort and detail is important to him.  Brian asks how evening wear is supposed to be comfortable.  Gawd, Jason can’t stop arguing with Brian.  I can’t understand any piece in his collection.  There’s some weird sleeves he’s put on Brian.  Brian says pressing will make a huge difference.  He’s got a LOT of black and gold too.  Brian tells him technically he’s got a lot ahead of him, and nothing can go down the runway unfinished.  He’s not happy that he didn’t get a more positive critique.  Spoiled baby!

Model Casting!

Jason says it’s very important.  Sunny says Jessica wants the girls that he wants.  Jessica wants someone with “glamour meets swagger.” They fight over models.  They saw their old models again.  Jessica wants her old model to open and close the show.

The L’oreal dudes are back.  They’re going to have photoshoots done with their collection.  Sunny wants his models to have his hairstyle.  That’s funny, borderline narcissistic, but funny. Jessica wants “greta garbo.”  What IS she doing?  Jason does not want really dramatic, and they say they want gold and black on the eyes.  Gawd, Jason is on-edge.  I don’t remember him being this snappy.

Cheryl Hickey will be modelling a dress in each person’s collection.  She likes strapless, one-shoulder, flowy sort of romantic.  Nothing super-fitted.  They have two days before fashion week to create this extra look.  They brought in help.  You know what that means.  The ‘ole gang is back!  They pull names.

Jason: Helpers: Brandon.

Sunny: Helper: Jeff.

Jessica: Helper: Kim.  Jessica did not want to work with Kim.

Poor Jessica!  Jessica hates Kim since she said so many hurtful things against her.  Especially when Kim will for sure sabotage since she loves Jason!  Kim feels Jessica is probably pissed she has to work with Kim, and Kim thinks that’s understandable.  Jeff says Sunny’s collection is really good and they’ll be fine together.  Sunny says at this point, to make another garment, its going to be really difficult.  Sunny is all over the place. Kim says she likes what Jessica has done.  Brandon thinks Kim is trying to be nice to Jessica.  Kim says it’s nice, but it’s nothing she would have done.  Brandon says he’s happy to help out Jason, because Jason looks like he needs help.  He doesn’t think Jason’s collection is the strongest.  Jason’s going to do something aweful.  Jason wants to model the piece for Cheryl off of Brandon’s old design.  That’s awkward!

The helpers are there getting their fabrics.  Jeff’s laugh is really annoying!  Kim tries to bargain for Jessica on fabric.  Kim says she’s Jessica’s partner whether she likes it or not, so she’s going to support her.  Brandon says that he’s buying black silk for Jason.  Brandon tells Brian that Jason wants to copy Brandon’s dress.  Brian says that this is a serious competition, and he wants to know if that happens.  Brian warns Brandon not to come to him later and say “that’s my dress”, and Brandon’s like “oh, I’m not.” And Brian’s all “you just did.”  Idiot!  Haha.  Brandon’s a shit.

Jessica is really excited about fashion week.  She feels like a little kid at Christmas.  She hasn’t started her Cheryl Hickey dress yet.  Brandon has a headband that says “Jason’s Helper.”  Kim says she wouldn’t want Brandon as a helper if she was in the final three.  Jason says he’s fortunate to have Brandon right now.  Jason feels Kim is doing a good job helping out Jessica.  Jessica is like “there’s a little bit of justice that Kim’s my sewing minion right now.”  Haha.  She says she could be a bitch, but she’s not.  Kim apologizes for being a bitch, she has no excuse, but feels bad and she’s not proud of it.  Kim says she turned into a raging asshole.  Jessica said it did mean a lot when Kim apologized to her. Jason says that Sunny is a control freak, but Jeff has a chance to redeem himself.

Brian comes in.  Jason has no sketch.  Brian asks Brandon if it looks anything like how he said in the fabric store.  Jason looks shocked.  Brian put it all out on the table.  Brandon’s like “fuck me sideways.”  Haha.

What’s that smell?  That’s the SHIT hitting the FAN!

Ohhhhhh, can’t wait until next week.

He’s a Fighter, Not a Lover!

OKAY FOLKS!!! DOUBLE EPISODE TONIGHT!  THAT’S RIGHT! ONE POST = TWO EPISODES.

The Hills

Season: 5

Episode: 1

Episode Title: Don’t Cry on your Birthday

Heidi and Stephanie meet for lunch or something.  Stephanie tells Heidi about her design school, but Heidi is only interested in Lauren.  Heidi remembers that Lauren’s birthday is coming.  Stephanie tells her that Lo is throwing Lauren a party on a yacht.  Heidi hasn’t been invited.  Stephanie tells her she can come with her.  Uh…bad news already.  Stephanie’s like “you’ll be fine.”  Whatever!  Stephanie loves dramz!!!

I feel tears this episode…more than some…

Lo talks to Audrina about being excited for Lauren’s party.  Lauren is thinking it’ll be a big girls night.  Audrina says she didn’t invite Justin.  Since when are these two friends? Fake, fake, fake.  Lo and Audrina think that Heidi will do whatever it takes to be Lauren’t friend.  Lo thinks Heidi should go make new friends.

The “girls” are all in a limo for Lauren’s girls night birthday party.

Heidi is contemplating what to wear tonight.  Stephanie says they shouldn’t dress up too much.  Heidi says she hasn’t told Spencer that they’re going to Lauren’s party.  Heidi says she doesn’t know what to say. Spencer asks what other ladies are going out.  Heidi says Stephanie arranged it.  Spencer asks if “Queen Beatch” is going to be there?  Spencer says he’s going “ounz, ounz, ounz.”  Um…somewhere that plays techno?

They blindfold Lauren and tell her they have a surprise for her.  Brody is on the boat and tells everyone that she’s there and to shut their gobs.  Lauren walks up to the boat and everyone’s like “SURPRISE!” when she’s all blindfolded and such.  She loves it.  Lauren’s wearing really dark red lipstick.  Not sure I like it on her.

Spencer’s out with “Charlie” some friend of his.  Spencer tells his friend and the bartender if you get married in Mexico it’s not legal and doesn’t count.  Um, what’s that supposed to mean?  You’re not married anymore? Spencer looks ready to paaaartay.

There’s a casino theme on the boat for Lauren’s party.  Heidi comes with a big gift bag….Lauren sees Heidi, and Heidi comes over and wishes her happy birthday.  Fake hug. Stephanie asks if it’s okay.  Lauren asks who invited Heidi.  She looks at Stephanie and is like “I know Lo didn’t, I was just being nice.”  UH OH.

On the boat, Heidi isn’t sure if Lauren’s okay with her being there.  Audrina’s like “it’s aiiiight.” Stephanie says she’s not sure why she’s involved.  Stephanie reminds Lauren that Heidi is a person without Spencer.  You mean Speidi? Lauren says its all about Spencer, but it’s not fair for her never to mention Spencer.  Lo tells Heidi that Lauren is uncomfortable with Heidi being there.  Heidi says it’s frustrating, because she can’t make the choice between her and Spencer.  Lo tells her at a certain point, she needs to decide, and move on. Haha, way to tell her!

Spencer is flirting with the bartender.  Who is this friend anyway?  I thought all he needed was his laptop.  Oh, Stephanie’s ex-bf walks in, Cameron.  Spencer says he’s going to say what’s up.  Why?  Cameron asks how Stephanie is.  Spencer says he doesn’t know.  Cameron asks about Stacie the bartender.  Stacie says the more she drinks, the more she dances.  She wants Spencer to pour some sugar on her.  She’s listening to a bit too much Def Leppard. And inhaling a bit too much helium listening to her voice.  Ech.

The Boat.  They bring out a huge gorgeous cake and Brody bits a chunk out of it.  So, Stephanie gets updates on her phone about what Spencer is doing.  From Cameron?  Is this Gossip Girl? Stephanie tells Heidi that Spencer went out to the bar with a bunch of guys, and he’s flirting with the bartender.  Heidi says she wants to get off the boat. He’s trying to make you feel jealous.  He’s just a bar fly. Audrina updates Lauren on Heidi’s drama with Spencer.  Heidi is SO mad.  Lauren says she’s going to see what’s going on with Heidi and stuff.  WHY?

Spencer is still sat at the bar, and looks at his phone where Heidi has called.  Heidi asks if he’s flirting with the bartender.  Spencer asks her what planet she’s on.  Spencer is offended.  Heidi tells on Cameron.  Spencer says Cameron is going to be beat up right now.  Charlie tries to get Spencer out of there before any dramz goes down.  Spencer approaches Cameron to talk.  Spencer confronts him about the text message.  Cameron says he was hitting on the bartender.  Spencer asks if he’s trying to get hurt.  Spencer asks him to hit him first so he can f*ck him up.  Spencer punches him and they scuffle like made in the bar.  Spencer’s just walloping Cameron’s head.  That guy did deserve a walloping!!! Telling on this guy?  WHOOP.  That’s really embarassing to be beat up by Spencer.

On the boat, someone tells Heidi that Spencer just hit Cameron out of nowhere.  MORE dramz!  Heidi says she’s shaking and Lauren consoles her.  Lauren tells her that boys fight, and it’s silly.  It’s true, who cares? Lauren tells Heidi that Spencer is an asshole and an aweful person.  Heidi says she doesn’t want to be a party crasher and cause drama.  YES SHE DID!  Lauren says that she hates the person that Heidi loves.  Lauren starts tearing, Heidi starts tearing. Lauren tells Heidi she still loves her, but she hates Spencer.  As a friend, she can’t sit by her when she’s with Spencer.  Heidi says she loves and adores Lauren more than anyone.  Well, not ANYONE. Since you’re with Spencer over her.  They cry and hug, and Lauren suggests they get a drink.  This all very romantic. The boat has docked.  Thank god!  Lauren says goodbye to Heidi and they all drive away.

WOWOWOW.  That was a craze episode.  Shitty birthday party!

2nd Episode….

The Hills

Season: 5

Episode: 2

Spencer comes in to Stephanie’s place and tells Stephanie that it was “uncool” that she took Heidi to Lauren’s party. Uncool?  Has he been hanging out with Jen Aniston? Stephanie and Spencer argues over who is wrong.  Spencer says that Stephanie is not loyal by showing Heidi that text message.  Stephanie tells Spencer that he has abandoned all his friends and his sister.  Stephanie wonders what he’ll do when he’s single and doens’t even have Heidi in his life. We’re not close, but I’m so glad that I have my brother, and that Spencer isn’t my brother.  Asshole!  He has SUCH an acerbic personality!

Lauren says she doesn’t expect presents anymore, and likes when she gets them.  hehe.  Lauren loved that all her friends planned her party.  Audrina accused Lauren of crying half the time.  Audrina blamed Stephanie for putting Heidi on the boat.  Lauren blamed Lo and Audrina for putting her on a boat.  Um, ungrateful!

OMG.  Heidi pops into the bar and sees Stacie the bartender that Spencer was flirting with.  As if?  Stacie remembers Spencer as “the fighter.” She asks Stacie about Spencer hitting on her.  Stacie said she didn’t know he had a girlfriend, and that Spencer asked what he needed to do to get her on the bar.  Stacie says she would not be happy if her boyfriend acted that way that Spencer did, and tells her good luck.

Heidi is waiting for Spencer.  Heidi said she talked to the bartender and that the bartender said he was way out of line.  I wonder if he’s going beat up the bartender too?  I wonder if that’s Stephanie’s fault.  Spencer denies what he said to the bartender.  Spencer tries to hit her back that she met with a stranger over a “rumour.”  Spencer says for the last 3 years that he’s been stuck to her hip, and he’s not been around other women.  Heidi takes this personally and tells him they need time apart to figure out what they’re going to do.  She’s going home. He tells her to tell her mom he said hello.  He looks worried.

In Colorado…  Heidi arrives at her parent’s house.  Yuck! Did anyone else see that green leather couch?  Money does not buy taste. Heidi says she’s frustrated.  Heidi tells her mom that she went to Lauren’s surprise birthday.  Heidi liked having her old friend again.  Then Spencer had to flirt on a bartender, and beat up Cameron like five times.  Her mom says that’s not okay, and that he’s the common thread in every issue she’s having.  DUH!  Thanks for summing up this entire show! Her mom says that things are better with her and Lauren, and not all is crumbling.

Stephanie and Lauren are shopping for fabrics, maybe for a project of theirs at school?  Stephanie told Lauren that Heidi invited herself. Stephanie reminds Lauren that she showed up at Heidi’s event before.  That’s true! Lauren tells Stephanie that it was really appropriate for her to be there, and she shouldn’t have done that.  Stephanie tells her all she wants is her best friend back.  Lauren tells her to stop pushing it. Why is she?  It is really annoying.  Sometimes I think this is all a big game of thrones between Spencer and Stephanie.

Spencer is alone at a coffee house.  Brody meets him there.  Spencer says he’s been awful.  Spencer thanks him for returning his call and hearing his desperation.  Brody tells him to cut the BS out, he’s there because he considers him one of his friends.  Spencer tells Brody about Heidi’s fleeing.  Brody said that he’d be pissed at Heidi for believing a random guy over him about the bartender situation.  Brody says they should basically split.  Brody tells him he can’t put too many eggs in one basket.  Eggs? In one basket?  WOW….there’s a metaphor!!!  I feel a bromance coming on!

Heidi has dinner with her parents.  Heidi’s mom is already trying to pawn her off on a new guy.  Haha. The wonder boy comes over to the table.  Wow, that’s not a setup.  Heidi feels the setup.  The ex-bf is Colby.  Wow, he’s already hotter and more enjoyable than Spencer. Wow, her mom is propping this guy up so much he’s through the roof.  Wow….her mom is awful!  Haha.

Brody and Lauren are at a hotel for dinner?  Brody asks how awkward it was to have Heidi show up?  Lauren says it was more awkward that Stephanie brought her.  Brody doesn’t want her to start on Stephanie.  What did Brody have with Stephanie?  Brody tells Lauren about Heidi leaving to Colorado, and that Spencer called him.  Lauren says that after everything, the two people that they burned, are the two people they have to call now.  Ironic, isn’t it?

Colorado.  Heidi’s mom is still pushing Colby on Heidi.  Heidi’s mom REALLY hates Spencer. Her mom says she really loves that Heidi and Lauren are friends.  Heidi tells her that Spencer does not have this power over her, she’s her own person.  Yes, oops, just hide Spencer’s hand up your back making your mouth move now….

Spencer is drinking with Charlie again and with Stacie again.  Spencer told Stacie that after Heidi spoke to Stacie.  Stacie tells Spencer that she thought Heidi was nuts.  haha.  Nuttier than a squirrels farts!  Stacie says tequila fixes all of their problems.  She wants to get her tender hooks into Spencer!  OH GOD.  She probably thinks if she marries him, that all her relatives can finally come to the US. That was bad!  Whatever.  Why else would you like this guy?

Strike

United States of Tara

Season: 1

Episode: 12

Episode Title: Miracle

This is the season finale tonight.  I feel it might not be a “shocker” type “cliff-hanger” of a finale.  We shall see though.

Tara talks to her new psychologist about meeting Trip Johannsen tomorrow.  The psychologist has misgivings, but Tara knows this is what she wants to do.  Tara says she feels kind of calm, she’s not expecting any type of apology.  Max isn’t so glad to see Trip.  The doctor says that their feelings might change when Trip comes into the room.  I wonder if this Trip guy even remembers who she is?  He’s come there to meet with him.  And he’s from Chicago…so he must.

Charmaine’s boyfriend Nick is entertaining the kids with some wierd berry.  Looks like Lemon to me.  Charmaine says lots is going on at the hospital.  Kate tells Marshall she has a meeting with HR at Barnaby’s tomorrow and wants a huge fat cheque for a Vespa.  Marshall is still mad at his mom.  Marshall tells Nick about what went down with Jason.  Nick says that one day he’ll be with someone one day and it’ll feel really authentic, just like he is with Charmaine.  Charmaine overhears this and looks at Neil’s number on her phone.

Kate is at Barnaby’s head office with the lawyers.  They advise her to drop their case.  They say that Barnaby’s is a very large company.  Kate says she has proof that there was misconduct with Gene.  She gives them her cell phone with a picture of him and his weird vibrator.  Kate tells them it’s one of Gene’s inventions.  THe lawyer says that by providing them with the photo it shows she was a willing participant with him.  She says that still doesn’t make it right.  She says they suck and leaves.

Kate comes home and falls down on her bed.  Kate tells Marshall they were complete assholes.  Marshall gets a text from Petula, saying that Jason was there with a girl, just ask Kate said would happen.  Marshall says she was right about everything, that mom was just trying to protect him.  Kate asks why he’s telling her.

Tara starts feeling more anxious when waiting for Trip.  She starts freaking out.  Max goes to get Dr. H.  Marshall arrives and sees Tara.  Marshall says it was necessary to come see her and gives her a big hug and says he forgives her and he loves her.  She goes into the room, and Trip and his wife Judy are there.  Trip says it’s good to see her again.  Judy offers cookies.  Tara says she’ll have one.  Now she’s eating her feelings!  The doctor mediates.  Tara says she does not remember what happened.  Tara says she was drunk, Trip says so was he.

Marshall is in the lobby reading a magazine, and Charmaine flops down in her cleavagy shirt.  Charmaine asks if Marshall likes Nick better than Neil.  Marshall says it’s apples and oranges.  Neil sends her a message.  Its the cat, it says “hang in there.”  A doctor comes by and asks if they need help, Charmaine says that her sister is talking to her rapist, and they’re just waiting.

Kate complains that she’s not getting compensated.  Gene says he got fired.  He’s in her living room!  He says she’s a sweet girl that has been jaded.  Gene says it was worth getting fired, he’d do anything for her.  He’s in love with her.  Gene tells her she’s the one.  Kate says no she’s not.  Kate looks creeped out…  Gene says she went to HR to try to get his attention.  Gene asks what’s next for them.  Kate telsl him that it’s really intense, that she’s going to go to the kitchen to get some water.  Gene asks for another Sierra Mist.  Kate grabs the keys in the kitchen.  She pulls the car out of the driveway backing into a trash can.

Trip says when he got back his girlfriend confronted him, but he denied it.  Trip says other than her being roomates with Heidi, he didn’t know her well, wasn’t really the party type.  Trip says he’s glad she called, cause it’s been troubling him.  Marshall accuses him of taking advantage of his wife.  The doctor calls a time out.  Tara asks him to go back in without killing anyone.  They go back in.

Marshall and Charmaine are still waiting.  They’re reading women’s mags, and Marshall does not want to know anything about any vagina.

Trip says the situation got out of hand, and he took advantage.  If he could go back, it would not have happened.  Tara thanks him for meeting.  Trip says “see ya T.”  Tara’s like “what?”  He just called her T.  T comes out of Tara now.  T says that was her night, not just Tara.  She had sex with Trip AND Mike.  She says Trip fucked like a jackhammer.  Buck comes back out too.  T comes back again.  Judy and Trip are scared.  T says that she fucked Trip, then they fucked each other (like her and Mike).  So basically, Tara was already a multiple, before that guy.  The boarding school incident could be re-traumatization.  Alice comes to all the sudden.  Alice takes charge of the situation.  Alice says Tara’s not inside listening.  The doctor tells Tara that she’s safe, and nothing bad will happen to her.  The doctor says that Tara is there, Alice says she’s weak and she needs her.  Alice says no one knows her better than she does.  Tara looks at Max and suddenly comes back to herself.  Tara looks at Max and says she wants to go home.

They come out and meet Max and Charmaine.  Charmaine tells her she looks skinny in a good way.  Marshall asks if she’s okay.  Tara said it was a lot of things.  They’re going home.

They drive home and Tara is sleeping with Marshall in the front seat.  At family dinner that night Tara looks at her family.  Tara asks Kate why she stole her car.  They all seem frustrated.  Max tells everyone to get their coats.  They go bowling.  Tara tries some of the “miracle fruit.”  Tara then drinks beer and it tastes like a chocolate shake.  Tara remarks that her kids are getting good at bowling.  Max says they learned from Buck.  Tara tells Max that it gets worse before it gets better.  Max says he knows.

That was a pretty boring finale I must say.  It’s a cute story though.

Any thoughts on what caused her to have multiples?  I wonder if she was like molested by her father or something.  That would be fitting since her parents are so awkward.  The weird father and the stiff mother.

Eh.

Not Her Strong Suit

Project Runway Canada

Season: 2

Episode: 10

Jessica says they’re still top 4 again, to Sunny. She says she’d like the Jessica Biffi brand to be like Alexander McQueen.  She wants people to want it, and REALLY want to spend lots of money on it. Jason says he’ll stay focused and win.  Genevieve says she needs this and she wants this.  Sunny says that the other three will have to fight for the other two, since he’ll make it in the final three.  He’s right!

Iman’s wearing a ‘miss’ today.  Terrible outfit.  It’s like barbie riding gear. Model choosing time.  I never recognize these girls.  They’re drawing names.  Jessica chooses Alyssa again.  Sunny chooses Tori again.  Genevieve sticks with Stephanie, and now Jason has to choose from 3 girls.  He chooses Ashley, his old model.  Two models are out.  Who cares.  The challenge is to design for female executives.  They will apply their design to business wear. Genevieve isn’t happy.  Sunny says it’s a tricky one.  Iman says tailored suiting is a very tough challenge.  Indeed!!!  I can’t wait to see this stuff though.  I love business wear.

They have $225 and 30 mins to shop.  Fabric time!  Genevieve says that two days isn’t enough time, but it’s a good time for her to show off her versatility.  If she had any. She’s doing something 30’s inspired.  Hrmm, sounds good.  Sunny feels pressure to maintain his standards, but he’s never made a suit before.  Really?  He’ll do fine, his tailoring is so good.  Jason has chosen pink fabric with white polka dots.  OMG, he’s designing a suit for a Mary Kay lady to match her Cadillac!

Back at the design studio.  Jason says he wants the suit to be unconventional.  He thinks everyone will go conventional, and he doesn’t want to.  Sunny is putting on his suit pants.  He asks if they like his camel toe.  Jessica reminds him that he has boy parts, and his model doesn’t.  He says he has model sizing! So he tries on his clothes.  Jessica says that professional women should be sexy, but can’t have boobs stickin’ out everywhere!  Duh.  She’s so cute. Genevieve says her design is fabulous.  Sunny says his parents are supportive of him being a designer.  His mother was a seamstress, and he hears her voice in his head everytime he sews.  He says he started his own line and now he’s broke, and he’d like to accomplish it on a large scale.  I’ve seen his old stuff, it’s really good.  He just needs an investory and a foot in the door.

Jason says there’s lots of animosity towards Sunny.  Jason says he’d rather be an underdog.  Oh, he is. Sunny says Jason is taking a gimmicky approach, and the gimmicks should be in the craftmanship.  It shouldn’t be a spectacle.

Sunny asks Jessica if he should do a collar.  Jessica says traditionally, a suit jacket has a collar.  Jessica says a tailored suit is the ultimate test of your skills.  Jason says he’s done for the day.  He says he missed Kim, but without her, he finished his stuff yesterday. Jason says he’s underestimated by the other designers.  Jessica says that school debt has stopped her from working on fashion after school.  Shelter was an important thing.

Brian Bailey comes in and says he’s here to see how the power suit is coming.  Genevieve has an issue with sleeves.  Jessica says that sleeves and pants aren’t her friends.  They SHOULD be.  Does she have a 5 o’clock shadow? Genevieve feels limited.  Well, that’s because she IS limited.  Brian tells her to look at her design and go back.  Genevieve says that Brian has been pushing her, but she’s been resisting since she’s a bit stubborn.  A BIT? Sunny says he’s decided on what he was going to do.  It sounds like Sunny’s really tamed it down.  Brian says they don’t need another boring suit, and tells Sunny not to sit back, but to be him, and go nuts.  He says he’s expecting an amazing suit from Sunny.  Brian looks at Jason’s work, and says there’s no shoulders.  Jason says that’s the gist of how it’s going to go.  That is NOT office wear.  Brian asks why he shyed away from a jacket.  Sunny says that Jason’s design looks more clubby, and it’s borderline trashy.  Brian is concerned.  So are we. Not that we care to see his collection at fashion week anyways.  He should design for ONE woman: Barbie.  Or maybe a Hannah Montana doll.

Jason says he doesn’t want to be safe.  Jason has decided he’ll do a real jacket, because he doesn’t want to risk not falling out of the lines.  Now he better work FAST!

Sunny’s jacket looks nice, but off the rack, run of the mill almost.

Jason says changing his design was a good idea, and now his design is stronger.  Sunny and Jessica talk about how they don’t want to go  home, and they wished Jason kept his original outfit.  Jessica says he’s mean, and Sunnys’ like “oh, like we weren’t all thinking that!” It’s true! I just wrote about it too! Haha.

Brian comes in and tells they they’ll be making a second design.  They’re going from the boardroom to the bedroom.  Their second design will be lingerie. Jessica is like “what the hell?”  The jacket, the pants, and the panties.  They brought help.  The models are there, but not for a fitting, they’re there to shop for the fabric they need for their lingerie outfit.  Jessica is worried, she’s sure her model’s never made lingerie.  NO, but i’m sure shes WORN and BOUGHT much more than Jessica. Jason says he’s never made undergarments, so it’s new for him.  He’s pondering between silk and chiffon.  WHAT?  Haha.  This should be interesting!

The models are at the store shopping for fabric.  They’ve never even been in fabric stores before.  Jason’s model doesn’t know what charmeuse is.  She thinks it’s a dessert.  They’re kinda cute! Stephanie is really pretty, Genevieve has a good model.  Brian’s having a tough time trying to help them.  The ladies are done!

The models are back with the fabric.  Sunny likes what his model got.  So does Jason.  OH! Apparently Jason is straight!  REALLY???  I’d believe Sunny to be straight over him.  But you got it here, “straight” from the horse’s mouth. Sunny says Tori has nice ta-tas, so he had to drape the fabric, on her…upper body.  Jason says the girls don’t have an advantage, but he does, since he likes to look at lingerie.  He says he gets hot thinking about it.  Jessica is like “awkward…” Yeah, I thought he was gay.  Now he’s just creepy.

Model Fitting!!!  Jessica’s undewear doesn’t come down.  Plus!  Genevieve is having trouble with piping.  Her model asks if it’s supposed to be crooked in the front.  She’s like “no.”  Jessica says that Genevieve’s stuff is still kinda drapey, even when it’s tailored.  That’s cause she’s a One Trick Drape-y! Jason has to make a new top, after realizing that his models’ top is too tight.  Um, right now???

Hair & Makeup!!! Those guys are so great.  They’re like a greek chorus.  Jason is fitting his model for her bran RIGHT there in hair and makeup!!!  He’s threading and pinning while she’s primping and preening! Genevieve says fashion week is so close she can taste it.  Sunny says he’s stressed out of his mind.  Jessica says she would hurt small children to be in the top 3.  Hrmm…

RUNWAY!!!

Last runway judging!!! So sad!   Guest judge is David Dixon, one of Canada’s leading fashion designers, who has shown at fashion week for 13 years.  Never heard of him.

Sunny’s look comes down.  It’s nice, very ’safari’. He says it’s not perfect, but good.  Looks good to me.  The pants could be longer, since they’re wide.  His lingerie is good too.  It actually loks like a swimsuit.  I’m surprised he made that!  It’s very perfect.  His lingerie is very business friday looking.

Genevieve’s model comes down.  It looks WEIRD.  I can see she’s trying, but it’s VERY unflattering looking.  The colour is aweful.  I can’t see a woman wearing that.  Geneieve made a slip, it’s VERY drapey!  And it’s boring.  it looks like shards tied together.  Like castaway style.

Jessica’s overall look is pretty good, the colour, i don’t like.  I love her idea of that jacket though! I’d totally wear that.  Her underwar is simple. It’s kinda like Sunny’s, its a cami and panty set.  It’s decent.

Jason’s model comes down.  He’s done a nice jacket, but i’ve seen it before. He’s done shorts too.  The jacket has tails.  Unless you work in a creative environment, you couldn’t wear that to work. The lingerie was good.  The panties fit well, the top leaved something to be desired but was decent.

Sunny says he wanted a strong feminine suit.  They think it’s a bit edgey, but extrememly well tailored.  The fabric choise was good, the shoulders could be wider.  David Dixon loves the suit.  The lingerie is basic, but very beautiful.  Iman loved the bra.

Genevieve says it’s her twist on the modern day power suit.  They say tailoring is not her strong suit.  No pun intended.  The back doesn’t fit very well, and the lines don’t match up.  They felt it was more an 80’s throwback, and it was overdesigned. They liked her lingerie though.  I didn’t.  It was better than her suit though.

Jason was inspired by a creative young lady and his mom.  Uh, he definitely has mom issues.  His mom is a very strong independent business woman.  They say it’s not really appropriate for boardrooms.  It’s not serious.  They say shorts are a real hit or miss.  The fabric choice is fantastic, she loves the gray. The fit is good.  Iman loves pink and grey.  The lingerie, he tried to be classy not trashy.  The lingerie was a little run of the mill.

Jessica imagined someone in a creative field, and wanted to showcase the body.  They say the pants are more successful than the jacket.  They say there’s too many details, and there’s problems in the shoulders.  They like the concept, they feel the neck line is too revealing, but the suit could be powerful.  The silhouette is great.  Iman thinks it’s sexy for women to use cleavage in the workplace.  Uh…okay. They felt the lingerie was boring.

I personally thought all the lingerie was boring, i’ve got it all in my closet.

JUDGE TALK

They loved Jason’s outfit, and feel he could do a good show on the runway.  They love how comfortable and confident he is.

With Sunny, they felt he was sharp, it was powerful and feminine.  He gave the fabric life and femininity.

Jessica, they liked the silhouette, but she didn’t go far enough.  About Jessica presenting an entire collection, they think she’s had a great range.

Genevieve, Shawn really liked the lingerie.  Iman thinks he’s easily provoked.  Genevieve was trying too hard, she should have had a different fabric.  Iman is not impressed, and fears about seeing her do a whole collection.  Iman says Genevieve has been designing for so many years, where Jessica is new at this.

Three spots…someone is going home.

JUDGING!!!

The winner is Sunny!!!  Yay! Was there ever any question? I can’t WAIT to see his collection!  Iman agrees with me.  He says he was so excited.

Jason has made it to the top 3!!! Wow.  He was better than Genevieve though.  Jessica BETTER not go!

They tell Jessica she had flaws, and her lingerie left them wanting more.  Genevieves lingerie was good, but bad in the business suit.

Jessica is in!!! Thank God! She looks like she’s going to puke!  I can’t wait to see her collection too!

She tells Sunny he “better recognize!”

Genevieve didn’t measure up…TWICE. Ugh. That should have been Adejoke’s chance….that sucks.  Oh well.  Sunny’s going to win anyway.  Maybe.

Brian is so sweet to people who leave.

OMG OMG OMG, I SO can’t WAIT to see next week’s episode!!!!

We gonna need a bigger boat

United States of Tara

Season: 1

Episode: 11

Episode Title: Snow

Tara is back on Xanax. Max tells Marshall to get ready for school. Tara says it’s okay that he’s mad at her, she’s mad at her too. Tara is in the shower washing the dirt off.

Marshall tells Kate that mom should be put away because she’s insane. Kate kinda agrees that they need a plan, maybe she should at least be back on her meds. Max says they’re not going to bail on her like Dr. Ocean. Marshall says it’s not getting better. Tara is listening in, Marshall leaves.

Kate says sometimes you just need to ask for help.

Max takes Tara to see a new doctor in a clinic type place.  The doctor tells them that she can’t get better unless she knows what happened to her.  He has a two week program and breaks down her and her alters.  Sounds like he has a plan.  The doctor tells Max that he has a counselling group for families of people with DID.  They’re both in separate group therapy circles.

In Tara’s group, one woman can’t remember being a child.  Tara tells them she got good at hiding it, she said she knew exactly how to get by.  Tara said she doesn’t remember what happened to her at boarding schoo but she remembers what happened after.  It was before summer break, and she wore her bathing suit under her clothes every day, and she just sat in her dorm window waiting for summer to come.  Someone asks “did it?”  She said the next thing she remembers was snow everywhere.  The doctor asked what she thought of the snow, she said it was no what she expected, but it was beautiful.

Marshall is at school and he has stolen his mother’s Xanax and has taken some.  Jason comes up to him to try to apologize.  Marshall told him it’s not his fault, that his mom is a freakshow and she’s in a hospital for the criminally insane now.  Jason says he feels really bad about what happened, he even talked to his dad.  Jason says he thinks he’s the most awesome kid in school and to remember him when he wins his oscar, and leaves after he hugs him.  Uh?

Tara tells the doctor that she could see everything that T did when she was kissing Marshall’s boyfriend.

At Barnaby’s HR head office, Kate makes her complaints.  Kate tells the truth about Gene.  But the HR manager tells her it has to be crystal clear that advances weren’t welcome.  She tells her the food service industry is a hot bed of sexual activity.  She basically accuses Kate of developing feelings for Gene, and its’ okay if she blew him.  WHAT???  As if.  Kate says she has better things to do than spending her time with a loser manager from loser Barnaby’s.

Tara is frustrated that her alters won’t come out in 4 days.  The doctor said that they’re not ready, they just met him.  She says she likes him and trusts him, and it’s frustrating.

Max is in the therapy group complaining about Tara.  They ask him what’s really going on deep down inside of him.  He has no idea how that can help.  He tells Tara it’s fantastic.  He’s sarcastic.  Tara says she’s not having any luck.  Tara’s roomate there has been “integrated” which means that she’s basically cured.  Max feels good about hearing that.

At home Kate says good morning to Charmaine.  CHarmaine tells Kate that she didn’t sleep with her new boyfriend, and maybe extended this lovely thing, but continuing to treat herself like a special prize he has to win.  Kate says she overheard her and her boyfriend having sex earlier.  Charmaine says at least she did’t let him sleep over.

Marshall is taking MORE Xanax.  Kate sees him and calls him Anna Nicole Smith.  Even in fag-land this is bad.  Marshall says he’s fucked up.  Kate tells him Jason is a bi-curious church monkey.  Kate tells him that Jason will marry and girl and he won’t love him like he loves Jason.  Kate says that T came out to put a stop to it.

Charmaine tells Max he has a lot of shit and he’s afraid he’ll lose it in the counselling group.  Charmaine says they should stay another week.

Tara is getting some medication injected to make her feel more relaxed.  The doctor asks about a night when something happened with a boy named Trip.  Buck comes out and asks what’s in it for him.  Tara is completely Buck now, and tells the doctor he’s done with therapy.  She’s playing darts in the commons room.  Tara calls the doctor a cocky son of a bitch.  Tara tells this old woman she’ll make her her special lady and puts her arm around her.  The woman looks freaked.

Gene is doing a meeting at work, and is having people sign a card for Tonya.  She has no eyebrows.  Gene says if anyone has anything to say to him that they say it to his face.  So much for anonymous HR!  Gene found out from other friends at Barnaby’s.  Kate says he got a call since he can’t keep his penis out of other girls faces that work there.  She’s just jealous.  Gene tells her that she was looking for affection and he was there for her, and he still is.  Kate tells him he’s creeping her out.

Buck is arguing with the men.  Max watches with the doctor.  The doctor says they have to be patient.  Max says it costs $6000 a week.  The doctor tells him to be patient and to go back to his room.

Charmaine and her boyfriend are drinking wine together with Marshall.  Marshall asks if this is what normal people are like.  Kate storms in and then leaves again.  Neil comes over and says he brought Jiffy pop and wants to know who wanted to watch Lost.

At Marshall’s counselling group, a girl is sobbing about the fact that her person isn’t getting better, and she can’t effing handle it.  Marshall pats her shoulder.  Charmaine is worried that her new guy will find out she had a thing with Neil.  Charmaine doesn’t want it to lower her stock.  Neil walks in, they’re afraid he heard.

The new boyfriend, Neil and Marshall are watching Lost.  He obviously heard by the look on his face.

Buck is talking about wierd stuff.  Max is very impatient.  The doctor tells him to ask Buck.  Buck says Max is making it hard for him to communicate.  Max takes out his aggression and frustration on Buck.  Max said it’s not what he had in mind for his life.  Max leaves and says he’s out of there.  Buck follows up and calls him a pussy.  Max says that if he sees Tara that he’s out and he’s not doing this anymore.  Max leaves the hospital.

Charmaine walks Neil out after.  Neil said he’d never tell her new boyfriend about their fucking.  She’s embarassed cause he heard her.  She apologizes.  Neil says she has better boobs now, she can’t be wasting her time.  He tells her he loved her body the way it was, and the thing between them was not just fucking, and she knows it.  Oh, you TELL her!  Miss Fancy with her fancy boy and all!

Tara comes into a room and sees that roomate there.  The roomate is leaving.  The girl tells her she’s been integrated before, but some alters were just hiding, but this time she feels good.  Tara looks shocked by that.  Tara sees a photo of the woman’s children.  The woman has not seen her kids in a while, her ex has full custody.  Tara looks worried again.  She lines up for the pay phone.  Tara pretends to be Buck, and tells him to hang up now.  Tara is calling Max on his phone.  She telsl him she wants to find Trip Johansson so he can tell her what happened herself.  Tara said she’s not mad at him.  She looks outside and it starts to snow.  That was wrapped up in a nice little bow!

Leavin’ on a jet plane…

Gossip Girl

Season: 2

Episode: 20

Episode Title: Remains of the J

Dan Humphrey has a fan.  Some kid read his story and sent him his for his opinion. Rufus thinks their lives are all working out.  They’re heading over to Lily’s for breakfast.  Vanessa came over and was mad since she gave Nate a week to call and he hasn’t.  Dan tell her he will.  Apparently Nate just sent her an email to meet her at his place.

Some girl comes up to Serena.  Someone who knew her from before, she’s in town from Spain.  Serena tells her Dan and her got back together, then broke up again.  The girl says everything is exactly the same as last time she saw Serena.  Serena is throwing a friend a sweet sixteen and invites this friend.  The girl calls it “her little party” um, how old are they? 17?  Woah, big difference.

Breakfast.  Lily is committed to making the family work.  Chuck tells them the morning is for business.  He does cardio at night.  He’s great. Lily and Serena tell Jenny that they were planning a sweet sixteen at their place for her.  Jenny doesn’t look entirely thrilled. Jenny says this year, things just seems different.  And she wanted it to be just a small group of friends.  Lily cancels the caterers.

Rufus opens a letter that says “financial aid denied.”  This for Dan’s college?  Oh no, that poor kid.  Welcome to the shitty reality of government funding Dan.  Your poor, but not poor ENOUGH.  This is how the government awards parents who are deadbeats by paying for their kids schooling, but hinders parents who work hard, but simply don’t make enough.  Fair eh? Serena’s brother thinks that Jenny cancelled her party because she thought no one would come, since she feels she has no friends anymore.  The beatches at school are going to ANOTHER party than Jenny’s anyways.  So Serena decides to call a friend.

Nate and Blair are seen embracing by Vanessa.  Chuck is the one who tipped off Vanessa.  I guess he wants an ally against this coupling of Blair and Nate.  Makes sense.

Blair tells Chuck at school that Nate and her are platonic.  Liar liar skirt on fire! Chuck tells her there’s no chemistry between Nate and her.  She gets mad about this.  Blair reminds him he fought for him and now she’s exhausted.  She said if she was with Nate, it’s because it’s easy to be with him.  Chuck asks her if it’s so easy why hasn’t Nate broken it off with Vanessa?

Dan asks if the Yale package is around, but Rufus makes an excuse about where it is.  Lily asked why he lied.  Rufus tells her about the financial aid.  Rufus can’t afford it.  Lily offers, but Rufus can’t accept.  Lily suggests that he sell the loft and move in with her.  Rufus says that’s a big step. Lily feels it’s the next one.

Blair gives Nate an analogy about Jennifer-Brad-Angelina, so that he’ll break up with Vanessa.  Nate tells her that he’s going to meet Vanessa to talk over dinner.  Blair worries about there being sparks.  Nate feels that it’s over with he and Vanessa, and he’s sure she feel the same way.  Nate says he’ll start with talking to Vanessa.

Jenny goes with Serena and Poppy (the friend from before) to shop for a dress for her party.  Serena tells Poppy she’s in a rut.  Poppy says she should be jet set, not high-school.  Duh! Poppy says that a 16 year old girl would want a big party.  She just needs someone to hold her hand.  They pick a more showy dress for Jenny.  Serena reignites Jenny’s party.

Nate tells Vanessa at dinner that it’s not working.  Vanessa asks if there’s someone else.  Nate says it’s about he and her, no one else.  She knows he’s lying, kinda.

Nate shows up at Blair’s and says it’s done.  Nate said things came to a natural end, and that it had nothing to do with anyone else.  Nate tells her he’ll see her tomorrow, they can hang out this weekend.  Blair looks disappointed.  Dorota comes in with champagne.  Blair complains that Nate kissed her on the forehead, like he was a man and she was a little girl.  She thinks maybe Chuck was right.  He was.

Vanessa shows up to see Chuck.  Chuck is deeply channeling Hefner in that robe, or “smoking jacket.” Chuck says that they’re making fools of he and Vanessa.  Vanessa tells him not anymore!

Jenny pulls out the board games.  Dan tells Jenny that Vanessa and Nate broke up.  Dan answers the phone and realizes that his dad is selling the loft since a real estate agent was calling for him.

Blair tells Serena that Nate and Vanessa broke up.  She tells Serena that her and Nate have been spending a lot of time together.  Blair thinks that Chuck was something to get out of her system, and Nate is her destiny all along.  Serena says that Nate is good for her, and she wasn’t really rooting for Chuck.  Blair tells them they have plenty of spark.  Serena is like “uh huh.”

Jenny comes to the Van der Woodsen’s with their games in her party dress.  Jenny thinks things seem to be going very good.  Dan tells Jenny that a real estate agent phoned.  Dan assumes that they’d be “movin on up to the east size, a delux apartment…”  Haha.  Jenny is like “no, we can’t live here, we’re Humphrey’s!” They get to the apartment and all they hear is music and there’s tonnes of people there.  It’s definitely not a board game party!  All the beatch girls from school are there because Poppy Lipton is there.  Jenny and Dan are confused. Serena says hi to Jenny.  Serena’s fake boobs are prominently on display again. Completely appropriate for a 17 year old girl.  But she looks a bit haggard, so she kinda looks 35, in that case, it’s completely appropriate. Jenny tells Serena she didn’t want this.  Serena said she thought that it was just cause people might not show up, but now there’s lots of people.  And a photographer!  Jenny asks Eric why Serena did this.  He thinks she wanted to prove to everyone she could still throw a good party.  Jenny says she’ll make sure she knows how GOOD a party can be and texts lots of party animals to show up.

Vanessa talks to Chuck and says that he’s staring at her boobs.  His revenge ideas included a Chuck Vanessa sex tape on the internet.  Is this Chuck’s next pursuit?  They show aup at the party confused that everyone is there.  Including Nate and Blair.  Vanessa grabs Chuck and kisses him.  WOW.

Serena realizes that a bunch of rowdy no-goods showed up.  Poppy is embarrased.  It’s not a posh party like theirs. Poppy is leaving, and thinks Serena should come.  Only, it’s her house.  More kegger losers come in and Serena wants her to get rid of these people.  Jenny said that their her people, she invited hers.  Eric tells her there are people having sex in her bed.  People are also wearing her mother’s clothes.

Dan is sweet talking some girls with some verbal diarrhea, but Serena pulls him away to help. Nate asks Vanessa who her new boyfriend is.  Vanessa says it’s purely physical between her and Chuck.  Nate tells her not to do something she’ll regret. Nate says that nothing is going on between he and Blair.  Blair says, YET.  Blair makes it obvious that they’re together.  Nate is still trying to hide his relationship with Blair.  She’s not happy.  Nate asks Blair what they’re doing.  Blair pushes him on the bed and asks him to do something.  Nate said things didn’t work out between them because they weren’t friends.  Blair said that he’s her friend this week.  She goes in to kiss him, but Nate is paranoid and moves away.  He’s not Chuck.  Blair is upset and leaves.

Vanessa is worried that they pushed Blair and Nate closer.  Chuck says to wait.  They see Blair stomp out of a room.  Nate comes out, Vanessa tells him that that went well.   Nate says something like “hope you feel good.”  Blah.  Whatever, Nate doesn’t like you Vanessa.  Nate is probably into men.  Or men that dress like women.  Something weird and kinky that future politicians are into.

Dan helps Serena change her bed sheets.  Dan tells her that she did ask for this all to happy by not listening to Jenny and thinking about herself.  Her hair looks TERRIBLE.  It usually looks so good.  Serena says her life is so highschool.  Dan reminds her, and all of us, that she is in highschool. Eric comes in and tells her there’s a problem.  There’s like hundreds of kids outside.  Why don’t they call the police?  Oh, looks like the cops already showed up.  Lily and Rufus showed up wondering what is going on too.  Well, they don’t look that miffed actually.  Until now, when she sees the state of her place.  Rufus tries to calm her down.  Everything is ruined and her clothes are all out of her closet.  Serena blames Jenny for all the people.  Lily doesn’t believe her.  Serena leaves and says it’s not her mess.  Jenny admits she posted the party on gossip girl. Jenny says the party that Serena threw was embarassing.  Lily says that Serena’s party sounded delightful.  Jenny says that at least last year it was her face on the cake, and the people knew who she was.  Jenny tells them she likes being herself, and she does not want to be a Park Ave princess no matter what her address might be.  Rufus asked what she was talking about.  Dan tells them about the real estate agent call. Jenny says she doesn’t want to live with her dad and Lily if they move in together.  Eric is shocked! He has no clue what’s going on.  Poor Dan, he’s not going to have money for college now.  Sacrifices.

Serena is at a bar with Poppy.  Poppy says this doesn’t have to be her life.  Poppy says that Serena needs to get away, like to Spain.  She invites her to Gabriel’s (her bf’s) parents place, and that they leave tomorrow morning.  Serena says she thinks she’s grounded.  Then she tells Poppy that she’s right, and they should go to Spain.  Looks like Serena is back to being “Bad Serena.”  Haha.

Lily says she’s grateful to stay at Rufus’s when her house was being cleaned.  Lily regrets jumping to conclusions with Serena.  Lily says they’re moving a bit fast, and it’ll be too complicated right now to move in together.  Lily asks what he’s going to do about Dan and Yale.  Dan overhears and asks what about him and Yale.  Dan realizes his dad was going to move in with Lily to pay for his education. Dan realizes he’s not needy enough.  Rufus says they have some time, he’ll work it out.  Dan says he’ll call his fan back in the meantime.  Rufus assures Dan they’ll figure it out.

Blair says she should have known that her and Nate were too good to last.  Blair said they may not have had drama, but they had fun together.  She says Nate is so nice and being around him didn’t hurt and wasn’t hard.  Until now.  She says she misses her friend Nate.  Blair sees Nate in the park.  Dorota tells Blair that Nate showed up to meet her there where their first kiss was.  Nate wanted to tell her that he does want to be with her, just not like that.  Not skankily.  He caresses her hair and they kiss.  It looks very romantic to me.

Serena is in the airport and a man approaches her and asks if he knows her.  She says no.  He says she met herself and was with a friend of hers calling herself Savannah.  The guy is Gabriel, her friends boyfriend.  Uh, wasn’t that with Georgina last year that they got in tonnes of trouble with?  I don’t remember him though.  Did she sleep with him?

Some family tells “Scott” that someone’s calling from Brooklyn.  It’s Dan Humprey, he’s calling.  Scott must be his fan.  The parents tell him they’ll have Scott call him back.  It’s gotta Lily and Rufus’s adoptive son’s parents.  The parents want to delete Dan’s incoming call.  Wow, that’s odd.  I guess Scott knows.

Lily sees her family playing board games and smiles.  She answers her messages.  Serena texted her telling her that she left for Spain with Poppy.

Blair and Nate are still kissing.

Chuck is lying in bed and Vanessa is putting back her dress on.  Vanessa says she wants to pretend last night never happened.  But they kiss again.  Vanessa says it means nothing and it’s just between them.  Looks like she’s fallen for Chuck!  I ain’t sayin’ she’s a gold digger!

Natural Born Killers

LOST

Season: 5

Episode: 10

Episode Title:  He’s Our You

Tikrit, Iran::: (flashback) Some old man tells his son to kill a chicken.  The son does not want to.  Another boy comes up to him and puts a hand on his shoulder and shows him some feed he has in his hand.  He makes a trail with the feed for the chickens.  He grabs a chicken and breaks it’s neck then gives it to the other boy who was afraid.  The boys father comes back and congratulates him.  He tells his father it wasn’t him. The dad says at least one of you will be a man.  He looks at the other boy and says “Well done, Sayid.” That kid’s SO cute!

1977 Dharmaville Prison::: Kid Ben comes in and tells the guard that he brought another salad for Sayid.  The Guard says that he’s not eating anyways.  Kid Ben brought Sayid a sandwich and a book.  Kid Ben asks if Richard sent him, as he’s his leader.  Sayid looks at the camera.  Kid Ben says it’s a camera, they can see, but they can’t hear.  Kid  Ben says that he ran into the jungle and Richard found him.  He wanted to be with the hostiles.  Kid Ben says he’s been patient, and if Sayid is too that he thinks he can help him. He’s always been a little conniving one eh?  Sayid is stunned.

Moscow::: A man is running through the halls of an apartment building, and goes inside a unit and locks the door behind him.  He rummages through a closet into a safe and opens it.  Sayid is after him, and pulls a gun on him.  the man thrusts money at Sayid.  Sayid kills him anyways.  Poh poh.  Sayid leaves the building.  He looks really slick btw.  He sees a man standing by an old car near an open gate.  The man is Ben.  Ben asks how it went.  Sayid said he tried to bribe him.  Ben tells him that they’re done.  That Sayid has taken care of everyone that posed a threat to his friends.  Sayid is like “that’s it? your’e just walking away?”  Ben tells him mission accomplished.  Sayid asks what he does now.  Ben tells him to go live his life, he’s free.  Come see me!

1977 Dharmaville Prison::: Horace comes to ssee Sayid and has some cutters and tells him to put out his hands.  Horace cuts off his handcuffs.  Horace says it’s nice to hear his voice and introduces himself.  Horace wants to know what he was doing out in the jungle.  Radzinski is there too.  Horace asks if he’s having a problem with his people, cause then he’d help him, or if he’s a spy trying to infiltrate them. Sayid says nothing.  Horace tells him he’s going to give him an hour to decide if he wants to talk to him.  If he doesn’t talk, then Horace will take this to the ‘next level.’

1977 Dharmaville::: At Juliet and Sawyers house, they both look at Kate and Jack.  Juliet asks Sawyer if this is over.  Sawyer says nothing’s changed.  Sawyer says Sayid won’t say anything, he’s got it under control.  Horace knocks at his door, he says he spoke to the prisoner and they have a problem, because Sayid said nothing.  Horace wants to know answers.  Horace wants someone to do his “thing” on him.  Sawyer says he’ll want a crack at him first thanks.

Sawyer goes down the the jail cell, and tells the guard to take his lunch.  Sawyer asks how he’s doing.  Sayid said that a 12 year old Ben Linus brought him a chicken sandwich.  Sayid asks how he can live with him there, Sawyer says he has no choice.  Sawyer comes into the cell with him and tells him he’s sorry, then punches him in the face.  Sawyer says that he wants to give them a confession.  That he’s going to give them intel on the hostiles in exchange for living with them.  Sawyer tells him he’s made a good life for himself there, and he doesn’t want it to go away, so either he join Dharmaville or he’s on his own.  Sayid says he guesses he’s on his own.

Uh oh!

Hurley works at the Dharma cafe!  That’s appropriate! He, Jack and Kate talk about what’s going on with Sayid.  Jack said that Sawyer told him to leave them alone.  Hurley tells Kate that Juliet and Sawyer are “together” the thought it was obvious.  Kate looks deflated. Jack said he knew.

Ben’s father comes into the prison cell where Sayid is.  Roger Linus can’t figure out how Sayid got caught, they’re supposed to be kings of the jungle, but you got caught by these idiots.  Sayid says “yet you’re the one with the mop handle.”  Kid Ben shows up and looks scared at the sight of his father there.  Kid Ben said he was bringing his father a sandwich.  Roger grabs Kid Ben’s arm and shoves his face into the cell and makes him admit he made the sandwich for Sayid.  Roger flicks his arm and tells him to go home.  Roger throws the tray away and leaves.  Wow, he’s an asshole.

Santo Domingo, D.R.::: (flashback) Ben visits Sayid where he’s working on a building site.  Sayid asks him what he wants.  Ben tells Sayid that Locke is dead and he thinks he was murdered.  Ben tells him it was retribution for the work that they were doing.  He tells Sayid he’s in danger, and those same people are outside Hugos mental hospital for them to show their faces.  Ben tells Sayid that he’s capable of things most other men aren’t.  It’s in his nature, it’s what he is. He’s a killer.  Sayid tells him he’s not what he thinks he is.  He does not like killing.  Ben says he was mistaken then, he apologizes. Then he walks away.

1977 Dharmaville::: Sawyer enters Sayid’s cell and tells him last chance, then shakes his head.  he then stun guns Sayid, and tells the guys to “take him over.”  They take Sayid in the VW out to a tent where Jazz music is playing.  They ask for a guy named “Holdem.”  It’s some nerdy looking older guy.  Sayid asks who he is.  Sawyer says he’s their “you.”  He must be a crazy torturer. Sayid lunches at the guy, but they restrain him in the “restraints.”  Holdem says that the restraints are for his protection that there are side effects to what he’s giving him.  They put something in his mouth.  Sawyer looks conflicted.  Holdem tells him not to be afraid, but just to turn his mind off and let them take effect.  Holdem tells him whether you struggle or not, one thing’s for sure, he will tell them the truth.  What was it truth serum?

Los Angeles::: (flashback) They’re back at the boat dock when they were going to make the decision to go back to the island or not.  When Sayid left, and said if he saw Ben again, it’d be extremely unpleasant for them both.  Sayid ends up in a bar later.  A woman asks him how much that scotch runs him.  Sayid says whatever it is, it’s worth it.  The woman is Ilana. She knew what the drink cost.  It was McCutcheon, the same scotch that Mr. Widmore drank. Sayid asks her if she’s a ‘pro.’  Haha, she did come off as one.  She’s under SOME cover obviously.  She says she’s not a professional anything, she thought he looked sad and she liked sad men.  She asks him other than drinking alone at bars, what he does for a living.  He says he’s between jobs.  She asks what DID he do?  He said the only think he was ever good at, she asks why he quit, he says he’s trying to change.  She says that she knows why he’s sad.  When he’s so good at something, there’s always going to be people that temp him to keep doing the job.

1977 Dharmaville::: Sayid looks comatose, then is awakened by Horace’s “hellos.”  Holdem will ask him a few questions, and he’ll answer truthfull.  Sayid says his full name when asked.  He tells them he was in handcuffs becasue he is a bad man.  Sayid says he is not a hostile.  He says he came on a plane, Ajera flight G16, and that’s how he returned to the island.  He says the first time he was on Oceanic 316, he was here for 100 days, then he left.  They’re all perplexed. Sawyer looks scared.  Sayid tells them all about their stations, and he knows about the Swan before it was even built.  Sayid tells them they’re all going to die.  He says they’re going to be killed.  Horace asks how he’d know that.  Sayid says he’s from the future.  Holdem thinks he used too much serum.  Sayid starts laughing.  Sayid tells him he used exactly enough.

Juliet explains Kate’s new mechanic job to her.  Kate has no clue what she’s talking about.  Kate tells Juliet that she’s knows about them.  Juliet says it’s a relief actually.  Horace arrives back with Sayid still in handcuffs.  Saywer looks at Juliet and Kate together, that can only spell trouble!

In Horace’s home, they have a meeting as to what to do with Sayid.  Some think they should kill him.  Sawyer’s trying to do what he can to save Sayid.  Radinski says that Sayid’s seen too much, they must kill him.  Horace says he needs more time to consider.  Horace calls for a vote.  Amy says Radzinski’s right.  Amy says she can’t sleep with one eye open.  I wonder how Ethan got away before Ben killed them all…hrmm. Amy says they can’t keep him here.  They have no choice.  Horace is such a humanitarian.  Horace says they’ll vote.  They vote to kill Sayid. Fairly unanimous.  They make Sawyer put up his hand to be unanimous.  Maybe Sawyer should have just let Sayid escape.  He knows what he’s like.  Sayid’s a maverick!

Los Angeles::: (flashback) Sayid and Ilana are making out and enter a hotel room. He throws her on the bed.  They kiss passionately.  He takes her knee high boots off.  She kicks him in the head with them.  They scuffle, she pulls a gun on him. She was hired to bring him to Guam by the family of the guy he killed on the golf course.  She’s a bounty hunter.  She tells Sayid he’s going to answer for what he’s done.

1977 Dharmaville::: Sawyer comes into Sayid’s cell and Sawyer comes in and tells him to escape but Sayid says he wants to stay.  Sayid said when he realized he was back on the island he felt there was no purpose. But now he knows exactly why he’s here.  Sawyer thinks he’s out of his mind. That his purpose is to get shot.  Sawyer leaves him there.  Sawyer goes home, then sees Kate’s door.  He knocks and she answers.  Sawyer asked why she came back.  Why they all came back.  Kate says that she’s not sure when everyone else did, but she knows why she did. A Dharma bus drives into the Dharmaville on fire.  The fire alarm went off.  Everyone scrambled.  We all know that Kid Ben will try to spring Sayid loose.  Maybe this is a decoy?  Jack asked what happened.  Sawyer indirectly blames them.  Jack hoses down the burning building.  LaFleur announces the fire.  The Prison Guard leaves and says he’s on his way.  A person emerges from the shadow in the prison.  He goes to Sayid’s cell.  Sayid realizes that Ben’s glasses are broken from his father’s abuse.  Sayid sympathizes with him and says his father was hard on him too.  Ben says through tears that he hates it there, and if he’ll let Sayid out, will Ben take him with him to his people.  Sayid tells Ben he will.  Sayid says that’s why he’s here.  I suppose Sayid wants to kill Ben and believes that’s his mission. So that Ben will not cause the terror that he has as an adult.  How can you kill a child?  I guess it takes a certain type of man.  A man who is a killer.  A natural born killer.  How can you kill a crying child with broken glasses from child abuse though?  Especially when he’s yet to kill anyone yet.  The future hasn’t technically played out yet.

Los Angeles::: (flashback) Getting on the plane.  Sayid sees Hurley and asks if she’s sure they’re going to Guam.  He also sees Kate.  He asks if they can get the next plane, that he’s very superstitious when it comes to flying.  She says this is the plane they’re taking.  They’re on the plane, and Sayid sees Ben come on the plane last minute.  Ben looks at him in almost shock.  Sayid looks at him in shock.  Sayid asks Ilana if she’s working for Ben Linus.  Ilana asks who he is.  Sayid told her he used to work for him.

1977 Dharmaville::: Ben opens the gate for Sayid, Sayid follows him out.  Then run into the forest together into the night.  Sayid sees a bus drive up.  he runs with Ben out of sight.  A man comes out of the bus.  The man is Jin.  Sayid confronts Jin.  Jin asks what he’s doing there, Sayid says Sawyer let him go, cause they were going to kill him.  Sayid tells him they don’t know they released him.  Jin wants to talk to Sawyer first.  Hurley punches Jin out.  Kid Ben watches this and is impressed.  Sayid told Kid Ben he was right about him, he is a killer. Sayid looks up and shoots Kid Ben in the chest with Jin’s gun, then sobs into his shirt.  WOW.  I’m shocked that actually happened.  WOW.  WOW.  Anyone else SHOCKED???

Does that mean future Ben just ‘disappears’ into thin air?  I wonder what the hell is going to happen now to Sayid.  This is crazy.